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horror movies

February 23, 2020

Mike’s Review: Dr. Sleep (2019)

★★★.5 out of ★★★★★ Nearly 1,000 pages of creepy thoughts, actions, and psychic happenings were laid out between the Shining and its murderous offspring, Dr. Sleep. It seemed impossible that 1) the Shining would be made in to a film, 2) that Stephen King would be so dissatisfied in one of the true horror greats, 3) that it would deserve a remake, 4) the story would evolve in to a 500 page psychedelic mishmash, and 5) that mishmash would be made in to its own celluloid opus. Seem fantastical? Well it is.

February 17, 2020

Mike’s Review: Three from Hell (2019)

★★ out of ★★★★★ At Rob Zombie’s darkened dirtbag core is a full and unfiltered embrace of the age-old adage “if it ain’t broke, don't fix it.” Slow motion. Hyperbolic acting (or in some cases no acting). Closeups so close you can count individual pores Captain Spaulding’s grease-paint soaked forehead. Weirdly rare and off-putting selection of non-Joe Walsh James Gang tracks. If you’ve seen House of a Thousand Corpses and Devil’s Rejects then you’ve been thoroughly exposed to Mr. Zombie’s cinema trickery.

January 18, 2020

Mike’s Review: The Marshes (2020)

★★1/2 out of ★★★★★ Word has it that the kids are in to mash-ups. Girl Talk, Danger Mouse, a little Jay Z, a little Beatles. Throw it all together and see what sticks. 2020’s the Marsh (originally released in 2018 in Australia) does just that -- but maybe a little too much.

October 25, 2019

Mike’s Review: Girl on the Third Floor (2019)

★★.5 out of ★★★★★ As we’ve all come to learn in the horror game, a haunted house, no matter how haunted, does not a movie make. For that matter, a bunch of spooky trappings within a haunted house, also does not a movie make.

September 12, 2019

Mike’s Review: Wolf Creek (2005)

★★★★ out of ★★★★★ The joy of youth. The post-college road trip. Finding your way in vast spaces. Unconstrained, unconfined, uncontrolled. The world is your oyster, until it isn’t.

June 27, 2019

Mike’s Review: Friday the 13th Part VIII (1989)

★★.5 out of ★★★★★ Is this really too good to be true? Too bad to be believed? So ridiculous we all laugh with it? Or so horrible we curl up in a cringe-worthy ball of shame? Answer: All of ‘em.

June 13, 2019

Horror Movie News: The Banana Splits Movie gets a trailer and an R rating

Horror is a big, broad, wide, deep and inviting genre. Everybody is welcome to hang out, have some chips, try...

May 1, 2019

Scariest Things Podcast Wizard World Video Recap!

Hey! Did we meet you at this year's Wizard World in Portland, Oregon? Yes? Well, then good to see you again. If we didn't meet you at Wizard World you can still check out the fun, fearsome, and freaky times that were had by all in this short video recap by the hyper-talented Matt Howl!

April 22, 2019

Mike’s Review: The Silence (2019)

🦇 out of 🦇🦇🦇🦇🦇 Just because you thought A Quiet Place was cool doesn't mean it needs to be remade six months later.

March 31, 2019

Movie Posters We Love: A Virgin Among the Living Dead (1973)

Whoa boy! A lot to unpack here. This Spanish-French erotic horror thriller (cuz’ there’s nothing more erotic than horror) was...

February 16, 2019

Movie Posters We Love: Le Crane Malifique (1965)

Peter Cushing! Christopher Lee! Oh my! This one's got it all. Most importantly it's got two of the giants of 1960s horror. The boys had a corner on the market for sure.

February 2, 2019

Horror Movie News: Fuck You Immortality Trailer Release

We'll just park this little 54 second trailer right on over here in the "huh" category. The Scariest Things Podcast challenges you to find a weirder, more off-putting, and more kick-ass fun trailer. Just try it. You won't succeed. We promise you.

January 27, 2019

Mike’s Review: The Green Slime (1968)

★★★★ out of ★★★★★ Yes. It’s true. Some films are so awesomely bad that they’ve come full circle and are just plain awesomely awesome. And that’s the truth. One such film is the truly underrated and much ridiculed, 1968’s, the Green Slime. I mean the name kind of says it all.

January 16, 2019

Horror Movie News: The Exorcism of Karen Walker Trailer

Do you like 1970s horror? Exorcisms? Hammer films? Of course you do! Just got word of a new flick that...

January 14, 2019

Mike’s Review: Slenderman (2018)

There are those films that need no exposition, and there are those that need a-plenty. The 2018 pre-teen fright fest, Slenderman, is a film that requires ample elucidation. Unfortunately, it contains little to none (read: none). While Slenderman does have some partially admirable elements, it also contains a bag-o’-problems.

February 21, 2020

Eric’s Review: Harpoon (2019)

★★★★ out of ★★★★★ It's all fun and games until you have to draw straws to determine who becomes the sacrifice in a lifeboat dilemma. Harpoon is a savage look at a love triangle gone completely haywire and lost at sea.

January 19, 2020

Mike’s Review: Mausoleum (1983)

★★1/2 out of ★★★★★ 1983 just called. Your VHS tape is overdue!

November 16, 2019

Mike’s Review: Eli (2019)

★★ out of ★★★★★ Hey Netflix, we see you over there! Yeah, you. Trying your darnedest to jump on that horror bandwagon, peer in to the abyss, produce that oh-so-perfect horror film, and reap the ghoulish accolades of horror fans everywhere. Just so you know, it's not working. While 2019’s Eli is awfully close to being a solid film you still have a lot of work to do to make in the fast-paced world of horror.

October 7, 2019

Mike’s Review: Martin (1978)

★★★★ 1/2 out of ★★★★★ Vampires have been around for a long time (read: possibly forever?) and their story has been told in a weirdly limitless number of ways. Sexy vampires. Gory vampires. Child vampires. Deaf vampires. Suffice it to say, the votes are in and humanity LOVES its vampires!

September 5, 2019

Mike’s Review: House on Sorority Row (1983)

★★.5 out of ★★★★★ College isn’t for everyone. There’s peer pressure, there’s social acclimatization, there’s the freshman 15, there’s the daily grind of keeping one’s grades in check to maintain that almighty scholarship, and then there’s the relationships. The social bond that’s created can be a lasting and spiritually satisfying affinity, but the bond can go so deep that it’ll eventually turn collegiate relations sour and crazy.

June 15, 2019

Mike’s Review: Vast of Night (2019)

👽👽👽👽 out of 👽👽👽👽👽 UFOs are real! Well, they might be real. Or, they’re probably imagined. Rather, we’re all crazy and we’re collectively imagining them. Or, maybe, just maybe, they really are real and the space aliens are making us crazy in an attempt to make us believe/not believe that they’re real/not real. All are real possibilities and 2019’s The Vast of the Night lays all of them on the table for us to sort out.

May 19, 2019

Mike’s Review: Annabelle (2014)

★★★ out of ★★★★★ Yes. Dolls are creepy. You know this. We know this. They just have a creep factor...

April 29, 2019

Horror Shorts: Treevenge (2008)

🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲 out of 🌲🌲🌲🌲🌲 Ah...the holidays. Yes. Those holidays. The Christmas-y ones. The holidays that fill you full of joy, happiness, togetherness, peace, family...frustration, long lines, anger, resentment, hatred, and, AND, AND....CHRISTMAS TREES! The bane of the past, present, and the future. Commercialism mixed with a toxic cocktail of entitlement, greed, waste, and environmental cynicism and acrimony. Just a plain ol’ dislike for mother earth.

March 31, 2019

Horror Movie News: The Silence on Netflix

Who knew there was a sub-genre of horror now being referred to as sensory horror. At some point there’s enough...

March 18, 2019

Mike’s Review: 31 — A Rob Zombie Film (2016)

★ out of ★★★★★ If you went to Sunset Strip and asked a hip-looking millennial what elements exemplified the grindhouse cinema era, what do you think the response would be? Confused? Indifferent? Bored? Titillated? Or do you think they’d start to rattle off a listed of oft-used Rob Zombie tropes and tripe?

February 10, 2019

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