★★★ out of ★★★★★
Delicious cherry pie. Would you like some eternal imprisonment with that or just coffee?
Author Archives
ZED
Robert’s Review: Motivational Growth (2013)
★★★1/2 out of ★★★★★
Jeffrey Combs lends his voice to a smooth-talking lump of bathroom mold in this slow moving psychotronic film. Did I mention Jeffrey Combs? Jeffrey Combs!
Robert’s Review: Halloween Party (2019)
★★★1/2 out of ★★★★★
When your school is built on the ruins of a creepy old hospital you’re just asking for trouble.
Robert’s Review: Noroi (2005)
★★★★ out of ★★★★★
A classic in the mockumentary/found footage genre is finally available to a wider audience!
Robert’s Review: I Am A Hero (2015)
★★★★ out of ★★★★★
A live-action take on the award winning Japanese manga brings some freshness to the zombie genre.
Robert’s Review: Verotika (2019)
★ out of ★★★★★
Danzig’s horror movie debut. No. Just no.
Robert’s Review: The Waiting (2020)
★★★1/2 out of ★★★★★
A brand new horror-romance-comedy from the mind of F.C. Rabbath.
Movie News: Soska Sisters Take On Sensory Horror
Just when you thought it was safe to rely on all your senses.
Movie News: ‘Scream’ franchise relaunch is coming!
I scream, you scream, we all scream for new Scream!
Robert’s Review: Sea Fever (2019)
★★★1/2 out of ★★★★★
A beautifully shot and unintentionally timely creature feature highlighting the struggle between Human Nature and Science.
Scariest Games: Trivial Pursuit Ultimate Horror Edition
Coming soon! Trivial Pursuit: Ultimate Horror Edition. Finally, you can prove to your friends that YOU are the horror expert.
Robert’s Review: The Hunt (2020)
★★★★ out of ★★★★★
Controversial, violent, and inflammatory; this darkly-comedic horror-adjacent battle royale will definitely give you something to talk about.
Robert’s Review: Mass Hysteria (2019)
★★1/2 out of ★★★★★
While it’s more comedy than horror, this splattery witch-based tale is an entertaining cat & mouse chase around Salem, Massachusetts.
Robert’s Review: The Grudge (2020)
★★★ out of ★★★★★
It’s a remake? It’s a reboot? It’s a… sidequel! And we’ve got jump scares aplenty in the most recent addition to Grudge lore.
Trailer Alert: Pathosis (2020)
Womp Stomp Films — makers of the astounding Friday the 13th fan film, Never Hike Alone (2017) — have their very first original short film hitting the festivals this year.
Robert’s Review: The Night They Knocked (2020)
★★1/2 out of ★★★★★
Don’tcha hate it when a gang of crazies interrupts your relaxing weekend at a remote cabin with an unexpected home invasion?
Robert’s Review: Snatchers (2019)
★★★★ out of ★★★★★
A mildly raunchy, splattertastic, alien invasion creature feature with a Mean Girls twist crossed with a teen pregnancy after school special? Yes, please!
Robert’s Review: There Are Monsters (2013)
★★ out of ★★★★★
Have a great idea for a horror movie? Here’s a perfect example of how to make your great idea almost completely unwatchable!
Robert’s Review: Eat Locals (2017)
★★★ out of ★★★★★
Filmed entirely in Hertfordshire, England, this charming vampire flick starts slowly, but saves itself with an action-filled second act and a thoroughly satisfying ending.
Robert’s Review: Jack Frost (1997)
★★★ out of ★★★★★
It’s a holiday classic! This very B-grade movie overcame studio bankruptcy, anomalous weather, and the fact that it’s about a goofy-looking 7-foot tall rubber snowman to achieve cult status as a direct-to-video release.
Robert’s Review: Countdown (2019)
★1/2 out of ★★★★★
This Final Destination rip-off is cliché, derivative, and predictable. You’ve got better things to do with your time.
Trailer Alert: Gretel & Hansel (2020)
The son of the original Psycho has reimagined the witchy tale from The Brothers Grimm and it’s being released on January 31st.
Robert’s Top 10 Horror Movies of 2019
2019 was another epic year for our favorite genre! Choosing only 10 to be the Best of the Best this year was hard work!
Scariest Interview: F.C. Rabbath returns with “The Waiting”
F.C. Rabbath returns with a ghostly new horror-adjacent project, The Waiting. Coming in 2020!
Robert’s Review: The Piper (2015)
★★★★ out of ★★★★★
An emotionally brutal and physically bloody South Korean take on the legend of the Pied Piper of Hamelin.
Robert’s Review: Hidden (2015)
★★★1/2 out of ★★★★★
The debut feature film by writing/directing team Matt & Ross Duffer — a.k.a. The Duffer Brothers — shows they knew what they were doing even before they took over the world with Netflix’s Stranger Things.
Robert’s Review: EndZeit (2018)
★★★ out of ★★★★★
A beautifully shot zombie-adjacent fable about nature, death, guilt, and self-determination.
Robert’s Review: The Drone (2019)
★1/2 out of ★★★★★
It’s the same team from Zombeavers (2014), but they’re not playing in the same league any more.
Robert’s Review: Sweetheart (2019)
★★★★1/2 out of ★★★★★
A fantastic heroine, an amphibious sea monster, and a tropical island. You should already be watching this movie.
Robert’s Review: Mary (2019)
★★ out of ★★★★★
In spite of some pretty camera work, Gary Oldman and Emily Mortimer couldn’t bail water fast enough to keep this movie afloat.