★★★ out of ★★★★★ Young women. Adventurous young women. Genetically perfect adventurous young women. Impossibly tight spaces. Blind killing creatures who’ve not seen the light of day for millennia. It’s the Descent for the tween generation! Plus, did we mention the forever hunky John Corbett?
Tag Archive for ‘2019 scary movies’
Mike’s Review: Haunt (2019)
🤡🤡.5 out of 🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡 Writing is a struggle. Too much exposition gives the appearance of being a churlish jerk who sucks all of the oxygen out of a room. While too little exposition has the air of being aloof, uncaring, and unwilling to let the audience in on the scares. Weirdly, Haunt vacillates between both words, but manages to tell this spooky story in the most ineffective way possible.
Mike’s Review: Eli (2019)
★★ out of ★★★★★ Hey Netflix, we see you over there! Yeah, you. Trying your darnedest to jump on that horror bandwagon, peer in to the abyss, produce that oh-so-perfect horror film, and reap the ghoulish accolades of horror fans everywhere. Just so you know, it’s not working. While 2019’s Eli is awfully close to being a solid film you still have a lot of work to do to make in the fast-paced world of horror.
Mike’s Review: Girl on the Third Floor (2019)
★★.5 out of ★★★★★ As we’ve all come to learn in the horror game, a haunted house, no matter how haunted, does not a movie make. For that matter, a bunch of spooky trappings within a haunted house, also does not a movie make.
Mike and Eric’s Review of It: Chapter Two (2019)
Mike’s Review: ★★★ out of ★★★★★
Eric’s Review: ★★★1/2 out of ★★★★★
The big horror movie that everyone has been waiting for has landed. It: Chapter Two delivers a good looking, well-acted and often scary film that is also overly long, and has a mechanical narrative style, but is, in the end, an enjoyable outing.
Trailer Alert: Black Christmas (2019)
Well, we’re not sure who asked for this, but it’s on the way. On December 13, 2019, we’ll all get a chance to sit down and ingest the latest spooky offerings from Blumhouse in the form of the re-re-re-make of Black Christmas.
Trailer Alert: Little Monsters (2019)
ZOMBIE ALERT: Two decidedly different performances (well three, technically) from the same actor in two horror films in the same year? Say it ain’t so!