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Reviews

Need a recommendation? We consume as many movies, TV shows, and books as we possibly can and let you know what we thought of them!

Mike’s Review: Girl on the Third Floor (2019)

★★.5 out of ★★★★★ As we’ve all come to learn in the horror game, a haunted house, no matter how haunted, does not a movie make. For that matter, a bunch of spooky trappings within a haunted house, also does not a movie make.
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Robert’s Review: Mary (2019)

★★ out of ★★★★★ In spite of some pretty camera work, Gary Oldman and Emily Mortimer couldn't bail water fast enough to keep this movie afloat.
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Mike’s Review: Martin (1978)

★★★★ 1/2 out of ★★★★★ Vampires have been around for a long time (read: possibly forever?) and their story has been told in a weirdly limitless number of ways. Sexy vampires. Gory vampires. Child vampires. Deaf vampires. Suffice it to say, the votes are in and humanity LOVES its vampires!
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Joseph’s Review: Candy Corn

★★1/2 out of ★★★★★ Though boasting some intriguing concepts and visuals, this mash-up of a cinematic valentine to 1980s fright...
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Joseph’s Review: Echoes of Fear

★★★★1/2 out of ★★★★★ There’s no question that the protagonist of this highly effective chiller is experiencing paranormal events, but...
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Eric’s Review: Killer Sofa (2019)

★★1/2 out of ★★★★★ Every now and again, you run into a title that you just need to check out because it seems so absurd. Remarkably, it's better than I expected (low threshold there) but it also isn't as gonzo as I expected it to be. Done with heart on a low budget, it's entertaining, warts and all.
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Mike’s Review: Wolf Creek (2005)

★★★★ out of ★★★★★ The joy of youth. The post-college road trip. Finding your way in vast spaces. Unconstrained, unconfined, uncontrolled. The world is your oyster, until it isn’t.
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Mike and Eric’s Review of It: Chapter Two (2019)

Mike’s Review: ★★★ out of ★★★★★ Eric's Review: ★★★1/2 out of ★★★★★ The big horror movie that everyone has been waiting for has landed. It: Chapter Two delivers a good looking, well-acted and often scary film that is also overly long, and has a mechanical narrative style, but is, in the end, an enjoyable outing.
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Mike’s Review: House on Sorority Row (1983)

★★.5 out of ★★★★★ College isn’t for everyone. There’s peer pressure, there’s social acclimatization, there’s the freshman 15, there’s the daily grind of keeping one’s grades in check to maintain that almighty scholarship, and then there’s the relationships. The social bond that’s created can be a lasting and spiritually satisfying affinity, but the bond can go so deep that it’ll eventually turn collegiate relations sour and crazy.
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Daniel Isn’t Real (2019) Review

★★★★ out of ★★★★★

Intensity: 🩸🩸 out of 🩸🩸🩸🩸🩸

What happens if your imaginary friend is full of homicidal suggestions? Daniel Isn't Real is a trippy tale of psychological breakdown and showcases two actors from proud Hollywood family legacies giving great performances

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Eric’s Review: Ready or Not (2019)

★★★★1/2 out of ★★★★★ Samara Weaving has a powerful star-making turn in this riotously enjoyable bloodbath of a film. Ready or Not is full of memorable characters, deft humor, and an intense nail-chewing plot.
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Joseph’s Review: Tone-Deaf

★★★1/2 out of ★★★★★ It’s mind-slipping conservative baby boomer versus self-absorbed liberal millennial in a fight to the death in...
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Mike’s Review: The Boar (2017)

🐷🐷.5 out of 🐷🐷🐷🐷🐷 The planet is running out of animals. Literally and figuratively. Hollyweird has given us sharks (Jaws 1-4), rabbits (Night of the Lepus), bears (Grizzy), fish (Piranha), and man’s best friend (Cujo). There’s even been birds, wolves, snakes, rats, and gators, and whatever the hell a sharktopus is supposed to be. One of the things that Hollyweird hasn’t gotten its money-grubbing paws on is the pig, javelina, or boar – until now.
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