🤡🤡.5 out of 🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡 Writing is a struggle. Too much exposition gives the appearance of being a churlish jerk who sucks all of the oxygen out of a room. While too little exposition has the air of being aloof, uncaring, and unwilling to let the audience in on the scares. Weirdly, Haunt vacillates between both words, but manages to tell this spooky story in the most ineffective way possible.
Tag Archive for ‘horror movie review’
Mike’s Review: Wolf Creek (2005)
★★★★ out of ★★★★★
The joy of youth. The post-college road trip. Finding your way in vast spaces. Unconstrained, unconfined, uncontrolled. The world is your oyster, until it isn’t.
Mike’s Review: Vast of Night (2019)
👽👽👽👽 out of 👽👽👽👽👽
UFOs are real! Well, they might be real. Or, they’re probably imagined. Rather, we’re all crazy and we’re collectively imagining them. Or, maybe, just maybe, they really are real and the space aliens are making us crazy in an attempt to make us believe/not believe that they’re real/not real. All are real possibilities and 2019’s The Vast of the Night lays all of them on the table for us to sort out.
Mike’s Review: The Lodge (2019)
❄❄❄❄❄ out of ❄❄❄❄❄
2017 gave us Get Out. 2018 gave us Heriditary. 2019’s dive in to intellectual terror is the Lodge. Just as its forefathers were dark, brooding, thought-provoking, and terrifying, so is this year’s entry in to the new age of thinky-horror. Note: thinky-horror is not yet an industry-accepted term, but you heard it hear first.
Mike’s Review: Winchester (2018)
👻👻 out of 👻👻👻👻👻
A spook show with too many spooks?
Mike’s Review: Pet Sematary (2019)
★★★.5 out of ★★★★★
Wait. Hold up. It took four cats to play the cat “Church”? And it took two kids to play Gage? That’s commitment!
Liz’s Review: The House That Jack Built (2018)
★★ out of ★★★★★
Lars von Trier takes you to Hell with The House That Jack Built
Mike’s Review: Velvet Buzzsaw (2019)
The art world is a tough nut to crack. The politics, the sexuality, the fortunes, the fame, the critics, the notoriety, the legacy — oh, yeah, and we almost forgot, the art. Art is often a vessel for missing elements in society, wanting, longing, and a respite from the day to day hum/drum attributes of life. Art can subjugate the mundane and keep our darker and more horrifying desires at bay. That is, when art is obeyed and respected. When it’s not…watch out.
Mike’s Review: You Might be the Killer (2018)
★★★ out of ★★★★★
If something is around long enough it’s going to be parodied. There will be barbs, jabs, satire and plenty of loving imitation. Even the tropes and trends that surround a specific genre will get reworked, turned inside out, and devotedly re-re-re-imagined.
Mike’s Review: The Witch in the Window (2018)
★★★★ out of ★★★★★
Many have characterized this film as “Hallmark Horror.” Which is, of course, lazy short hand for the fact that the film has an emotional component and it manages to draw the audience in to a deep and meaningful concern for the main protagonists. Mind you this is not “This is Us” or some other network pablum, but a legitimate exploration of a father/son relationship in the throws of pre-teen puberty — set against HORROR, glorious horror.
Mike’s Review: Slenderman (2018)
★.5 out of ★★★★★
There are those films that need no exposition, and there are those that need a-plenty. The 2018 pre-teen fright fest, Slenderman, is a film that requires ample elucidation. Unfortunately, it contains little to none (read: none). While Slenderman does have some partially admirable elements, it also contains a bag-o’-problems.
Mike’s Review: Leatherface (2017)
★★.5 out of ★★★★★ In 2015, when Leatherface principal filming began, something must have been amiss in the cosmos. There […]
Mike’s Review: The First Purge (2018)
★★★ 1/2 out of ★★★★★ It’s almost difficult to characterize this film as fiction. There’s too many ghastly and prescient […]
Mike’s Review: Silent Night Deadly Night (1984)
★★★★.5 out of ★★★★★ This ain’t no Charlie Brown Christmas. Directed by Charles Sellier, Jr. There’s some of those […]
Mike’s Review: City of the Living Dead (1980)
★★.5 out of ★★★★★ Christopher George fights grizzly bears (Grizzly). He fights masked killers (Graduation Day). He fights a jigsaw killer […]
Mike’s Review: The God Inside My Ear (2017)
★★.5 out of ★★★★★ This film is ambitious. The God Inside My Ear lets you know that it’s ambitious from the […]
Mike’s Review: The Nun (2018)
★1/2 out of ★★★★★
Lay. Off. The. Fog. Machine.
Mike’s Review: Satan’s Slaves (2017)
★★★★.5 out of ★★★★★ Directed by Joko Anwar Why is it that so many contemporary films are pining for the days of […]
Mike’s Review: Shock (1977)
★★1/2 out of ★★★★★
Sometimes, just sometimes, a quiet stay in a bucolic looney bin really helps one’s psyche.
Mike’s Review: Dr. Butcher, M.D./Zombie Holocaust/Island of the Last Zombies/Zombi 3/Queen of the Cannibals (1982)
★★ out of ★★★★★
Ok, I gotta get something off my chest. I saw the trailer for this beauty back in 1985 and was so horrified by its content I could have sworn that I’d seen the whole film — front to back. This was some seriously dense scar tissue built up over the years. But alas, I’d never seen this flic. That was, until a couple weeks ago.
Mike’s Review: We are still here (2015)
★★ out of ★★★★★
Ok…I think it’s time for you guys to leave.
Horror Movie News: Unsane Trailer
I’m not crazy! I swear! This intense thriller is arriving soon to a theater near you. Stephen. Soderbergh. Shooting an […]
Mike’s Review: The Mutilator (1984)
★★1/2 out of ★★★★★ A VHS box really is worth a thousand words… Sometimes a picture’s worth a thousand words, sometimes […]
Mike’s Review: The Visit (2015)
★★★★out of ★★★★★
Uh…are you sure you want me to crawl in the oven, Grandma?